Yom Kippur Sermon - 2008
God’s questions YK am 5769-2008
Rabbi Mark S. Kram, Temple Beth Or (Sermon inspired by Rabbi Jacob Schacter)
At the HH, we focus on change – how do we do things differently this year from last. But what DO we do? Where do we start? How do we begin to TURN? Turn back to ourselves, turn back to God and make the changes we need to make?
INTRO STORY
How To Get To Heaven
A Religious School Teacher asked the following questions and these are the answers that she got...
"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the temple, would that get me into Heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday School class.
"NO!" the children all answered.
"If I cleaned the temple every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"
Again, the answer was, "NO!"
"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my wife, would that get me into Heaven?" I asked them again.
Again, they all answered, "NO!"
"Well," I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"
A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD!"
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Well, the kid’s right. But before that happens, while we’re still in the “thick” of the HH and on the Holiest day of the year, YK, which is a rehearsal for death. Why? Rabbi Shefa Gold reminds us because on Yom Kippur,
“We fast from food, drink, sex, washing and wearing leather as a way to detach ourselves from the physical body, and experience the nakedness of our existence without distraction. It is even the custom to wear the clothes that you will be buried in. For the whole day of Yom Kippur, we act as if it is our last day, our only day to face the Truth, forgive ourselves and each other, remember who we are and why we were born. Yom Kippur reminds us that we are all dying. There is no time for regret, worry, fear, no time to put off facing the truth, or to delay thanking our beloveds. On Yom Kippur each moment takes on an urgency. We walk through most days only half-alive. Yom Kippur, like every real encounter with Death, urges us into the fullness of living. On Yom Kippur, Death becomes our rebbe.”
Tradition says, “When they escort a person to his final, Heavenly judgment after his death, the Heavenly tribunal asks him some questions.” The first four are:
1) Did you conduct your business transactions faithfully?
2) Did you set aside fixed times for Torah study?
3) Did you engage in procreation?
4) Did you hope for Messianic salvation?
Sounds like one of those Heaven jokes – what happens when you appear before the pearly gates? Why are these the “top four”? Why do these questions make it to the top of the rabbis list?
The first: 1): Did you conduct your business transactions faithfully? But why does it stress your business life and not your personal life? Why is it that how moral, ethical and honest were you in conducting your business is more important than how you lived with your famliy, the ones you love the most?
The rabbis suggest that it is one thing to be moral at home – most of us don’t lie to our families; we don’t deal dishonestly with our spouses or partners or our kids. We give it to them straight and they likewise. It’s almost too obvious that we should behave appropriately to our families. After all, when we are with our families we feel most safe, most trusted and trusting. It is where the relationship is lifelong rather than perhaps short-term as in business. Where they know us well enough that it’s truly hard to lie or to deceive. And if we did try to “fake it” or “hide something” we would get away with it for about 2 minutes because they can see it on our face!
On the other hand, in business, well, cutting a little here and a little there, a little “shaving” here and a “little” shaving there, thumb on the scale, or a “Get it while you can” attitude – we might think doesn’t hurt anyone, but….. but look where it got us today. I’m certainly no economist or Wall Street trader but even I understand the Wall Street collapse was based upon GREED.
We read about Greed as the reason for the mortgage failures in every news article. Wanting a little more and neglecting propriety to get there. And these folks – the sellers and the buyers – went home each night to be with their families – to hug their wife or husband, and their kids. After all, they must have thought – I’m taking care of my family. AND in fact I’m helping my customer take care of theirs. After all, they are living in a house they never would have had without my help.
But think about it: They surely wouldn’t have given that advice to their kids or their best friends. But, as we [wrongly] say “business is business” – it’s sad to think that we almost expect that kind of behavior. We’ve seen too many in high office get away without being punished, without taking responsibility for their errors of judgment or outright mistakes or dishonesty that we’ve become a bit numb to it all. Enron – so many had investments in it – including pension plans and other investments not for profits companies and so many individuals who depended on that money to simply take care of themselves in their older years. And now mortgage meltdown…
So rather than repeating this question as did you treat your family fairly – better according to the rabbis, the true test was about how you conducted your business.
2) Did you set aside fixed times for [Torah] study?
Ever heard the phrase “I meant to do this, but forgive me, life got in the way”? How often did you expect to get something done and not succeed because of emergencies or interruptions or phone calls, emails or ten new tasks? Of course the obvious understanding of this is clear – without setting a fixed time for Torah study, Jewish learning, it simply doesn’t happen. There are so many other things to do. No one has a clear schedule. No one has too little to do. How long does an empty space on your calendar stay open – before someone fills it with this or that demand or assignment?!
On the other hand, if we looked at this differently, perhaps we can expand our understanding. Let’s ask the question in another way: “Is your study of Torah fixed?” In other words, is it stagnant from Hebrew school years?! I have this picture of each of us as adults sitting in a 1st grade classroom where our legs hardly fit under the desks. And we’re figiting, throwing papers, spitballs, airplanes at each other.
Are you satisfied with only an elementary school education in your field or at work? NO, of course not! Well, if not, why should you be satisfied with an elementary school education in our Jewish lives? What steps have you taken to grow your Jewish knowledge from what you learned growing up?
Every day I hear the following, “Rabbi, I’m embarrassed. I didn’t learn ‘such and such’ in Hebrew school. Or I’m asked to fill out the Hebrew parts of a Ketubah at a wedding for the witnesses. Always from a bright, successful and talented person in their field unable to write their name on the Ketubah in Hebrew! It never fails! The lingering feeling I get is sorrow – because it is so sad to see this adult with literally an elementary school Jewish education (I’m not expecting another rabbi – I’ll fill those shoes) embarrassed to admit and speak about it. And usually it’s about something so very basic that the question is absurd.
So have you set a time to “fix” your study of your heritage, your history and your tradition?!
3) Did you engage in procreation?
The answer to that question is generally easy to see. It’s hard to hide offspring. Judaism places a very high priority on having children – the ideal, according to Hillel – is one of each sex – a boy and a girl. That way, they “mirror” the first couple and thereby allow for procreation to take place down the road. The Jewish birthrate is low, and most likely with young people marrying much later, will continue to drop. Of course we’re looking for numbers, but there is another way to look at this question. To do so requires some understanding of the Hebrew. The rabbis use the word Osek – La’a’soke – as in the blessing we recite before Torah study – B’A’A’E’M’H, A’K’B’V, La'a'soke b’divrei Torah. Praised………who commands us concerning occupying ourselves or busying ourselves with the study of Torah. Laasoke b’d’vrei Torah; laasoke b’preeyah ur’viya.
Here, the command is to busy yourself with procreation. On RH and YK/the HHs the re-examination we do – the chesbon hanefesh – forces us to look at the question differently. Let us rephrase: maybe the question is not, “Did you engage in procreation?” But rather, “Were you engaged with your children, with what you produced?” Did you work with them? Pay attention with them? Give them your time and your attention?
Harry Chapin’s song, The Cats in the Cradle, never fails to bring a tear when I hear it and. It speaks about a child being born to a father was too busy to give him what he needed and craved most – himself. The song goes, “But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay. He learned to walk while I was away. And he was talking 'fore I knew it, and as he grew, He'd say, "I'm gonna be like you, dad. You know I'm gonna be like you." And the refrain, "When you coming home, dad?" "I don't know when, But we'll get together then. You know we'll have a good time then."
But “then” never comes.
Friends, you can’t get back time. On Shabbat we know about time – how to expand time and focus on time. We even know how to pretend on Shabbat and act as if we have all the time we need as we build, as Rabbi Heschel taught us, a 25 hour long “Palace in Time.” Time cannot be exchanged or replaced. We cannot find more time, neither can we buy time. The key is to use the time we have well – and especially especially with those whom we love. It is a precious commodity.
4) Did you hope for the Messianic salvation?
A fundamental principle in Judaism is the coming of the Messiah. In fact, liberal Jews have changed the equation to hope and wait for the Messianic Age. The age when the lion will lie down with the lamb – the lion won’t tear the lamb apart – at least for one meal – for food, but will approach his normal prey in peace – with no ill intent.
According to tradition, there are certain things that will take place when Elijah ultimately returns to earth to announce the Messiah’s coming (he didn’t die but ascended to Heaven on a merkavah – a Chariot). The Messiah will be a military hero who will not be vanquished. He will bring peace on earth – end all wars. And as the prophet said, “lo yisa goy el goy cherev” – no sword will be lifted by one nation against the other – and neither shall nations have a need to learn about or study war anymore.
A wonderful thought. But in spite of hoping for Elijah each Saturday night at Havdalah and singing a song to him, we always seem to postpone the festivities and Messiah parade for yet another week – since he did not come. As Jews, we are perpetually stuck between hoping for Him to come and expecting it not to be so. The prayer: “Pray as if everything depends upon God, and act as if everything depends upon you,” seems ever more appropriate.
But part of the expectation of the coming of the Messiah is how we view the status quo. For Jews, the status quo is NOT acceptable. To live in a world that is far from perfect, to see hunger and disease, and hate and suffering all around us and not attempt to do something about it – to feel that nothing is missing, is just wrong. Ask yourselves this question: “This year, have you and I yearned for a better society?” “Have we tried this year to make the world a better place?” OR have we accepted the world as it is and done nothing?
There is a story about…
A man who found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole.
Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further.
So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.
The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.
Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.
In his kindness and haste, the man did not realize that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening, were God's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.
On YK, we come to the synagogue ready for a transformation. Part of that is prepared for us – there is that little hole, an opening, an opportunity – God is waiting for us – we can see the way out. The High Holidays provide that path. They help us see the way to a more whole and complete life. The rest is on us – WE must struggle and push and find our way through. The challenge is pushing ourselves out through that hole to create a new and better self.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it might cripple us.
We would not be as strong as we could have been. The time is now, are you ready?
Four questions – and four NEW answers. They hold the balance for our lives for the new year:
1) Did you conduct your business transactions faithfully? Did you assume a strict ethical and moral posture ESPECIALLY in our business or professional activities?
2) Did you set aside fixed times for Torah study? Were you satisfied with the limited Jewish education you received as children and DID NOT try to improve it or move it to an adult level?
3) Did you engage in procreation? Did we engage with our children, our spouses or partners and give them the gift of us, of time? AND,
4) Did you hope for Messianic salvation? Did we accept the world as it IS or did we try to make it a better place for ourselves and for our children?
THESE are the questions to ask ourselves at the New Year. May our answers for 5769 be better and our intentions be clear as we continue our work here for the HH. AMEN